Waiting

Waiting is proving itself to be harder than I had originally thought. It's only been 3 months since we were originally a match for an expectant mother who eventually decided to parent her child. I'm actually quite happy for the mother. Our adoption agency counceled this young woman and the process has completely changed her life for the better. She has started relationships with the local jails to talk to other expectant mothers who are incarcerated.

So I continue to wait for God to bless our lives with a bundle of joy. We have a great support team with family and friends and our church has been amazing. I put my brave face on when asked where the process is and thank the Lord that so many people care and are prayer warriors for us. I keep telling myself and others that God simply isn't finished with our miracle. I truly beleive that. We also go to support meetings that our agency offers. They definately help. It's bitter sweet being with other potential adoptive families who are going through the same thing. I don't wish the heart ache on anyone but it's nice to know that Ray and I aren't alone in this.

I sometimes catch myself being a little depressed when I'm around small children. I can't help but to imagine myself with our child at that age and things that we would be doing. I have really close friends who have just discovered that they were expecting their first child. I couldn't be happier for the two of them. They are going to make such wonderful parents. I've come to realize though that I can only be around them for short periods of time and I feel awful about that. Of course they are on cloud nine with their news and all they seem to talk about is their unborn baby. Don't get me wrong, I would be doing the EXACT same thing! But I want to continue to be happy for them and I know myself well enough to know that if I'm around them day in and day out, that the happiness I have for them will soon turn into envy. Last thing I need to do is make a fool of myself and push away two incredible people who I love to pieces. Well I guess those are all the thoughts I have for now, more to come later.
"Be strong and courageous for the Lord your God is with you". Joshua 1:9

Profile showing

On Monday June 14 I was sitting at work when I received a phone call from our social worker. She stated that she had a birth mother who we marched perfectly but needed our final profile book. I was able to reach my former sister in law who was willing to come out where I was working and pick up our information and then run it to our agency. The profile would be shown that same day to the birth mother. How exciting to be asked to view our profile before it was submitted. I have to admit that I was a bit
emotional but was trying ever so hard to not get my hopes up.

Well 2 weeks later we get the word that the birthmother who viewed our letter has decided to parent her unborn child. I have to be honest and say that I'm a little disappointed, but I'm so greatful that the BM chose life. A few minutes later I received an email from the agency giving us updates as to how the office is doing. They currently have 4 BM's that they are couseling and 3 who have chosen adoption. It seems as though the birth mother that was considering us is due January 2011. The child is biracial (Caucasian and Hispanic). So we keep praying for those who have found themselves in a tough situation that they make the best possible decision for their unborn child.

God’s blessings to you! Let us start by first telling you that you and all birth mothers remain in our constant prayers while you are in the process of possibly choosing an adoption plan. May you feel Gods love around you as you read through profiles that could ultimately be from your child’s adoptive family.

About Ray and Elise

We are Ray and Elise. We started dating in April 1999 and in October 2002 we were married. It’s been a beautiful several years, that’s for sure! We share many common interests such as our love for the Lord. We are both members of the choir at church and are bible school teachers for children ages 3-7. We both enjoy music, cooking, traveling, and entertaining family and friends. We look forward to our date nights, which happen about twice a month and our weekend getaways to the beach or mountains on our anniversary.

Elise about Ray

Ray is a devoted husband and father. He has shown that he understands and appreciates the meaning of compromise. I think this quality has made him a better father to his daughter who

currently resides in Maine. Ray is so full of humor and it appears so effortless when he can brighten someone’s day by giving a simple smile, a few words of encouragement, or lending a hand to someone in need. I find it fascinating how he can communicate and is understood by people as young as 2 and as old as 90. He’s also a hard worker and is committed to giving his family a good life. I admire the fact that even after working a full day, he still gives back to the community 2 nights a week by doing charitable work at a local lodge. I thank God every day for letting my path cross with someone as wonderful as Ray.

Ray about Elise

Elise is a very caring and compassionate person who loves those she surrounds herself with very deeply. Some may say she is stubborn, I like to think she is simply strong, which makes her dedication to her causes, that much deeper. She loves being around children, whether it’s with my daughter, our niece, or our nephews ranging in ages 1-13 years old. Not to mention the children we teach. I sit there in awe each week when I am able to witness these small children gather around her, fighting for a place next to her, and hanging on to every word she says. Children from other classes always seem to venture into ours to see what lessons and activities that she has prepared for them. She makes it fun and is amazing with them.

About Lauren

Lauren is a very active 13 year old young lady. She’s currently on the softball, basketball, and cross country teams as well as the cheerleading squad. Lauren also enjoys theater and was recently cast as Charlotte, in “Charlottes Web”. With all of her extra curricular activities, Lauren is still able to maintain her grades and is currently a straight A student. Lauren is alot like Ray in the sense that she is very outgoing and sociable. Because of these qualities, she is extremely popular with her peers and makes friends very quickly. Lauren lives in Maine with her mother but spends her summers and major holidays here in Virginia with us. Last summer she was very instrumental and enthusiastic about helping to prepare her new brother or sister’s nursery. She even created a few art pieces which are displayed in the room.

Our Family

We are both very close to our families. Rays family lives 1000 miles away in rural towns in Maine but we look forward their semi annual visits here. We also try to make at least one trip north a year. Just not in the winter…Elise isn’t ready to become a polar bear, even if it’s only for 7 days! Elise’s family lives about 10 minutes away and we get together a few times a week, sometimes sharing a nice meal and other times just enjoying one another’s company. Even though we are all grown now, we still enjoy our “family vacations”. Traditions have played an important role in both of our lives and we look forward to keeping some old ones but also incorporating new concepts. Elise’s immediate family as well as Ray’s daughter has thoroughly enjoyed preparing the nursery. Both families are ecstatic about the possibility of welcoming a new life into our hearts.

Our Home

We live in a 4 BR, 2 ½ BA house on a quiet cul-de-sac. We look forward to hearing the pitter pattering feet running around the openness of our home and the yard awaits little bare feet running through the grass. Our 2 year old Lab, “Chase” can’t wait to have someone to catch fireflies with. Our neighborhood has 2 parks within 4 blocks and one of the best school districts in the area, within 1 mile. In the summer months, you can find our entire neighborhood out in the sac with our grills going and children running and riding their bikes.

In Closing

We hope this letter has given you a glimpse into the lives we lead and would gladly answer any questions that you may have. Prayers are with you during this process of you deciding the best for your baby. God has a plan for you and this precious child. May He continue to bless you and comfort you in whatever you may decide.

“Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

Ray and I have been encouraged to start a blog to network with the goal of possibly finding a birth mother who is thinking about an adoption plan. It will also be a way of us logging our thoughts through the process and sharing our journey with those we love.