Emotional roller coaster

So we are now experiancing the emotional roller coaster side of things. We were approached on Halloween from a member of our church who knew a woman who was due to deliver the first of the year who was considering adoption. We met with the expectant parents in November and felt that the meeting went extremely well. We found out later that night that she was pregnant with a little girl. Could this be our Jocelin?
Weeks later we found out that the father was now having second thoughts. He had an aunt who was wanting to take care of the baby. What could I do other than put my brave face on. I have to admit, I was a little sad but wished the best for this baby girl. Just after Christmas, we got another call from our church friend that the birth mother was in the hospital and wanted us to know that the family was yet again pondering the thought of an adoption plan. I listened to what was being said but was afraid to get excited. New Years Eve I got a call stating that the mother was deep in labor. I asked if they needed anything or wanted us to come to the hospital. The idea was shot down but I completely understood. I just wanted them to know that we were thinking of them, no matter what they decided. The baby was born 12/31/2010 weighing in at 5 lbs 14 oz 18 inches long.
Sunday 01/02/2011 as we were leaving church, I received a phone call asking us to please come to the hospital. Ray and I got there and I remember praying that the Lord keep me strong and not get attached to the child we were about to meet. As soon as we entered the room, the mother asked if we wanted to hold this precious baby girl. Of course we did!!! I honestly didn't feel anything towards the baby, perhaps because that's what I prayed for. We left after about 45 minutes, and I have no regrets going and meeting Lilly Mae.
About a week later my friend from church called and let me know that she had the baby for the night and wanted to know if we wanted to see her. Again, of course I said yes. She let us know that she had some errands that she had to run and before she could ask, there I was saying yes!!!! bring her here and go do your errands. Some of our best friends were over visiting and my mom was with us. We got 3 beautiful hours with this perfect baby, and got to share these incredible moments with those who meant the most to us. I remember holding
this angel in my arms and whispering to her asking if she was our Jocelin. Her bright green eyes opened right up! Pictures were snapped and the entire house was in awe over her.
The next day we were at church and in walks our friend with Lilly. We spent the service with her and the entire congregation prayed over this sweet sugar plum. After the service, our prayer warriors from the church came over and got to hold her. A few of them whispered to her that the church was claiming her and that this was her home. One dear friend handed her back over to me stating "it's time to go back to your mommy." Needless to say, the tears were flowing!!
So here we are a month later, still waiting to find out if this is indeed the baby that we've been praying for. I will tell you, the past few weeks have been extremely difficult emotionally. She's all that Ray and I seem to think about. I know in my heart that God put her in our lives for a purpose. There is a reason why we met her, we just don't know why yet. So again I fall upon my favorite verse in the bible. "Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you.